A Year with the Contemplative Pilgrim
Step Ten: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
As I continue Camino preparations, I'm reminded of why recovery is so vital. At a recent meeting celebrating my sponsor's 36 years of sobriety, I saw that the spirit of AA lives on through its autonomous meetings bonded by the Twelve Steps and Traditions. The personal experiences shared drive home that following the Steps really does keep us sober and provides opportunities to help others.
Step Ten focuses on maintenance - continuing to take personal inventory and promptly admitting when we're wrong. This aligns with the nightly Examen I practice from the Ignatian Spiritual Exercises, allowing me to reflect on attitudes and responses throughout the day. As much as I'd like perfection, I'm still human with slips and missteps. But recovery provides a path to recognize and correct failures - a true blessing!
No matter how insightful my past inventories or how deeply I've pledged improvement, those old negative knee-jerk reactions can still sneak up, like road rage sparked by another driver's inconsiderate move. That flash of anger risks undoing hard-won progress. In the past, such setbacks enabled the toxic thinking of "This doesn't work, I'm just a failure, why bother?" That slippery slope of self-defeat allowed relapses.
But Step Ten teaches me to take real-time inventory when negativity strikes. I can calmly examine in that moment where the reaction stemmed from - usually control issues rooted in fear, like dread of an accident prompting me to angrily lash out at perceived threats. More often than not, the situation wasn't truly life-or-death serious. Rather than wallow in shame, I can reality-check, talk it through with my sponsor, and find forgiveness by honestly taking daily inventory.
The power of Step Ten lies in that final phrase: "And when we were wrong, promptly admitted it." What freedom to simply acknowledge mistakes instead of covering them up or running! This radical honesty allows me to accept errors, understand root causes, and keep improving. Hardships and failures become steppingstones toward peace when I'm willing to inventory them with support.
The Camino will no doubt provide ample slip-up opportunities - wrong turns, physical setbacks, unmet goals. But living Step Ten equips me to own up, reset, and keep moving forward rather than surrender to defeat. Continual accountability and growth beats languishing in stagnant shame.
Until next time,
Keep on truckin!!
that’s an interesting observation… thank you. when will you be walking again?